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Friday, December 25, 2009

Hahaa. Ernie said, Red ChriStMas to me! LOL. tt's kind of funny. LoL!

In any case, tdy i dont feel that gOod actually. well, besides the 1st day 'OFF' chaos, i feel the effect of moodswings soo hard that tdy i teared. aLot. and this is soOo not me.

flaShbacks of the past keeps haUnting me back wherever i gO. it just doesnt feel right. a surge of sadness drowns me deep. deeper. a flood of childhood moments rushed through the cells of my mind. pierced right thru my heart. hit the tearbag, it burst flowin on my delicate cheeks. it is excruciating no doubt abt it. Indeed, im a frail little girl. my vitality are straining. but i know, i have to inevitably replenish the fuel in me to keep on driving tru this endless road junctions that had me stucked most of the times. i doNt haf the license yet, but i had tO take on the wheel still. poor child.

Ernie said this once, 'im a child living in an adult body'. i can relate with that. totally. but i guess, i haf to consider myself lucky. as Allah still loves me, regardless of wat i did, the sins i've committed, Allah still guides me and grant me my wishes. Alhamdulillah for all that he had given me. Dear Allah, give me more challenge if u see the strength in me to overcome it, but reduce the intensity if u see the feeble, incapacity in me to face it. Syukran Ya ALLAH.

MystiQ

* 12/25/2009 11:21:00 PM
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